Hainam Chicken with Rice and Lemon Iced Tea

Let’s talk about Dubstep. According to Wikipedia, the definition of dubstep is:

“Dubstep (/ˈdʌbstɛp/) is a genre of electronic dance music that originated in South London, United Kingdom. Its overall sound has been described as ‘tightly coiled productions with overwhelming bass lines and reverberant drum patterns, clipped samples, and occasional vocals’.”

Dubstep has changed over the years since when I started listening to it. Music evolves so quickly and it changes so fast. The latest trend in mainstream media is the electronic music genre. Which brings me to my next point; many people consider what they hear at raves “real” Dubstep, which I highly disagree. Dubstep is not all about the “womps” and “transformer sex” noise you hear from certain artists. I guess you can say that’s a subgenre of Dubstep, but my argument is that it’s not “real” Dubstep so lets be clear with that.

Can’t imagine how that sounds like? Roll up some greens, relax, and let the music do the talking. Enjoy! (I highly recommend getting a subwoofer (if you don’t have one) before to listening this)

I went to a small Japanese restaurant called Hazuki in little Tokyo. This small restaurant hidden away in Little Tokyo in Downtown Los Angeles is truly a gem, it is a traditional Japanese restaurant that deserves more attention than it gets.

I’ve been here three times now and there is always only one waitress and cook, almost like a small family business. Sometimes there is a wait to get seated and served, but it is well worth the wait.

The dish to get is their Buta Kakuni (Braised pork belly).

This delicious braised pork belly literally melts in your mouth and you cut the meat with your chop sticks with ease. It is cooked for several hours so the meat is very tender and delicate, my mouth starts to water as I think about it. Other foods to try at this place are their Soft Shell Crab Salad and Broiled Miso Salmon which are equally delicious.

This place is hidden away on the second level of the Little Tokyo village on 2nd St, away from most of the foot traffic and other restaurants. If you’re ever in this part of Downtown LA, be sure to pay a visit to this hidden place.

Cheers with a cold mug of Sapparo.

For the people that don’t know me, I’m a type of person where I rarely never miss previously planned engagements, meetings, phone calls, etc, you name it, I rarely miss it. The times I do, I feel really bad because I either made the person feel sad or get angry at me, I hate that feeling when stuff like that happens. Some people can just let it go and be whatever with it, but I can’t. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t go begging for their forgiveness and go out of my way, because what’s done is done, you can’t turn back time. Because of this certain thing today, it lead me to a couple of thoughts of why I am like this.

My conclusion is this… As I was growing up, I was raised by my father who is a: Perfectionist (that’s an understatement I think). Whatever I did, nothing was on par with what he wanted, he always wanted more. It felt like whatever I did, nothing was up to his expectations, I think that molded me into who I am today. I try to make sure that whatever I do, I do it right, and do it well. Whenever I did something that was not up to his expectations, I felt like I let him down and myself down, which makes me hate letting others down or feel upset because of me.

I pride myself on being a secure person that knows what he wants, what he is capable of, and what he needs, etc. I just find it funny how I just realized that even with all that, I am insecure with the fact that I am always thinking I’m not doing enough to satisfy somebody else. I always try to make myself satisfy everybody in someway, I realize I can’t do this all the time, so I focus on the times that I know I can. (like meeting with somebody for drinks) But when I fail to do a simple thing like that, it messes with my head so much, although I don’t show it outside, inside I’m pretty much torn up.

I’m thinking about starting smoking again… I don’t know yet. Cigarette taxes went up, fuckers want like 7 dollars for a pack these days. That’s holding me back.. I think I’m going to go for a drive to clear my head.

PS.

On a side note, I have everything for my car in my room except the camber kits that I’m picking up on Monday… BUT NO WHERE TO INSTALL THE CRAP. It’s like being ready for sex, condom, bed, and horny and all that, but no girl. Fail. FML.

You’d feel the way I do with these sitting right behind you.

Where to start..?

Work. Ah, yes, work. Work is great, chill co-workers and chill managers, the days lately have been tiring because a few employees have decided not to show up which causes the rest of us to pick up their slack. I’m going to be working at the Temple City store and Chino Hills store at the same time for 2 weeks in June, I’ll probably be working a combined load of 50 hours or so, which is pretty bank for me. The downside to this is that I’m going to probably end up tired as hell all the time with no time for freedom. At work, I’m pretty stress-free, all I think about is just finishing what I’m supposed to be doing and nothing else really. I like it.

School… school this semester is pointless I think, I have 3 classes that I am taking, Management Principles of Business, Composition, and Business Information Systems. My management class is great, I love the teacher and I actually learn something new, which I love to do. I have a 100% in that class and I enjoy the class very much, I actually look forward to going to that class every week. My other two classes.. I can’t say the same. My English class is a joke, it feels that I am in a ELD class, I’ve learned what I’m being “taught” for 2 straight years now, once in my senior year of high school and once at PCC. I really don’t even know why I have to take this AGAIN. My BIS class… That is a complete joke, the teacher is basically learning what she’s “teaching” us as she teaches. She can barely solve her own problems that she gives out and has the same troubles as people who are learning. It is a bullshit class. If you can’t tell by now, I am person who enjoys learning and learning NEW things. Since these classes are Gen Ed, I just want a passing “D” and get over it.

I love writing on this blog.. it helps me relieve so much stress and helps me get rid of my thoughts. Like I’ve said in my other posts, I can’t really have a heart-to-heart with anybody I know so I pour out my emotions onto this piece of HTML on the web. I really don’t care if anybody reads this or not, it’s basically my online public journal, enjoy it I guess.

Onto serious matters…

Emotional attachment is the subject on my mind lately. Ever since I’ve had my heart broken (by my father, my friends, and ex-lovers), I’ve pretty much cut off any emotional attachment I have with ANYBODY. What I mean by emotional attachment is the attachment to people on a level of emotions. (i.e. becoming sad or upset when people don’t call you to come out and chill, not being answered, etc) If I were to not communicate or ever see some of my friends again, I wouldn’t really care, it’s sad, but very true. What scares is me that this might be true with my family as well… I should see a therapist or something because this can’t be healthy. I don’t even second guess myself when I quit talking to people, I honestly don’t care. In a way, I guess that this is a defense that I’ve built up so that I can’t be hurt by others, a parody of the “hedgehog’s dilemma” I guess? I have no problems making friends and making connections, but I also have no problem breaking it off in a heart beat.

This a message for the ladies, the “hard to get” act does not fly well with me, it will backfire… hard. I will lose interest in you before your next text to me, so don’t even try.

I guess this all traces it’s roots back to my “I don’t take anybody’s shit” part of my personality. If you give me shit, I will probably give you shit back. I would like to also point out that I am a person who does not snap at people when I am stressed or angry, I don’t believe in sharing my problems or projecting it on others. What ever stress or anger I have is mine to keep, I don’t like projecting it into other people. This is why you’ll rarely ever see me talk about my problems with other people, it’s not too bad because I manage to pour it out here.

That’s about all the thinking I’ve been doing lately, I do find it funny how the previous post was all happy and shit and this one is dark. Baseball is a good metaphor for life really… I’ll show you why. Curve balls are like the randomness of life, you never know which way it’s going. Taking a swing is like trying to get at those curve balls with whatever you have and hit it out of the ball park. Basically, this is my metaphor:

Life is like a game of baseball, you gotta take a swing at those curve balls that come at you and hope that you hit it out of the park. Every time you don’t take a swing, you might have missed that one ball that could have given you a home run.

I hope you get that metaphor.

1. Monotone
2. Care-free (not the actual definition you think it is, I’ll explain)
3. Serious
4. Happy-go-lucky
5. Expressionless

I believe all those are true, when you speak to me, I am very monotone and getting some kind of expression out of me is difficult unless it is something truly exciting… (although I kept the same composure even at a track day and I don’t know anything else that can top that kind of fun). I am very serious with most things I do and I don’t like to play around unless the matter at hand is something light; this is where the happy-go-lucky part comes in. And lastly, the part where I am care-free: To many people, I may not show any affection or show care unless you know me on a deeper level. This is something I did not actively intend to do as this is how I was raised. The problems I have, I care about them very much, but I just don’t show it. That is probably why most people think I have no problems or if I do, I don’t care about it.

Anyway, back to the point: Why I am content with life right now?

I’ve realized that I do only three things and they are: Work, School, and ride my motorcycle. I make the bread at work, I learn at school, and I let myself be free by riding. I rarely see any friends besides the people I ride with on weekends and to be honest, I don’t really care. Why? I really don’t know why, I guess I just got used to being alone now. These three things keep me busy and they make me happy believe it or not. Work is great, the pay is pretty good for a college student making enough to pay my bills and pay for my goodies. School is pretty great, I got onto the Dean’s List last semester with a 3.83 GPA which I’m proud of. And riding my bike explains itself already.

I also have a track day coming up on June 27th at SOW and I’m excited for that, my first actual formated track day with the GMR guys. A few setbacks (renewing my car and bike registration and my speeding ticket) have caused me to delay modding my bike for a month or two, but I’ll get back to that ASAP. But yeah, I think life is good right now. Hopefully it’ll stay that way.